Adventures in Durdenville

Wed, 26 Apr 2006 19:13:07 GMT

S'it bad that the fuckin' National Jump Rope Championship's on ESPN and s'amusin' me enough that I don't care f'I can't find the remote?

Mon, 30 May 2005 00:09:19 GMT

Alright, so my host is slow as fuck, BUT that doesn't mean m'some ungreatful ass or somethin'. So thanks to the lovely and sexy ladies Jess and Meru for makin' my journal look like more than shit.

Ah Hallmark Holidays...

Mon, 14 Feb 2005 16:53:40 GMT

There's this girl I don't know
Comes by every year or so
And if I get the mail before my mom does
Then I will stay out of trouble
She'll change every year
Even pretty without beer
She doesn't care about my hair
My car, my tiny pee pee in the mirror

Whoo, yeah!
She's finally here
Whoo, yeah!
She comes one time a year
Whoo, yeah!
She's finally here
Whoo, yeah!
My Playmate Of The Year
She moves me
She makes me grow
I'm so happy and boy does it show
Now she's going to my head
I'm gonna make this milky clear
You're my Playmate Of The Year

Hello how are you
It's great to see you too
Let's grab a sock
It's time to rock
And afterwards
You never want to talk
We always agree
Who's in charge here is me
We never fight
You know I'm right
It's always straight between you and me

Let me go down on this girl for a day
We can play spin the bottle
Everyone can hear her say
That I was the best she's ever had
She could be my playmate
And she could call me dad

Whoo, yeah!
She's finally here
Whoo, yeah!
Comes one time a year
Whoo, yeah!
She's finally here
Whoo, yeah!
My Playmate Of The Year
She moves me
She makes me grow
I'm so happy and boy does it show
Now she's going to my head
I'm gonna make this milky clear
You're my Playmate Of The Year

Thu, 10 Feb 2005 19:48:18 GMT

Johnny was bad, even as a child everybody could tell
Everyone said if you don't get straight
You'll surely go to hell

But Johnny didn't care
He was an outlaw by the time that he was
Ten years old
He didn't wanna do what he was told
Just a prankster, juvenile gangster

His teachers didn't understand
They kicked him out of school
At a tender early age
Just because he didn't want to learn things
(Had other interests)
He liked to burn things

The lady down the block
She had a radio that Johnny wanted oh so bad
So he took it the first chance he had
Then he shot her in the leg
And this is what she said
Only a lad
You really can't blame him
Only a lad
Society made him
Only a lad
He's our responsibility
Only a lad
He really couldn't help it
Only a lad
He didn't want to do it
Only a lad
He's underprivileged and abused
Perhaps a little bit confused

His parents gave up they couldn't influence his attitude
Nobody could help
The little man had no gratitude

And when he stole the care
Nobody dreamed that he would
Try to take it so far
He didn't mean to hit the poor man
Who had to go and die
It made the judge cry

Only a lad
He really couldn't help it
Only a lad
He didn't want to do it
Only a lad
He's underprivileged and abused
Perhaps a little bit confused

It's not his fault that he can't believe
It's not his fault that he can't behave
Society made him go astray
Perhaps if we're nice he'll go away
Perhaps he'll go away
He'll go away

Hey there Johnny you really don't fool me
You get away with murder
And you think it's funny
You don't give a damn if we live or if we die
Hey there Johnny boy
I hope you fry!